Disciplining Johanna

Surprised that one day short of 6 months. I've had to discipline my darling daughter.

She refused to drink water after a feed, and went into a tantrum. After much coaxing, she still continued her ways. I had to talk to her, then place her in her playpen to isolate her for 5 mins, while she whined and cried away. After 5 mins, I picked her up, cuddle her, told her I loved her, kissed her, yet insisted lovingly that she needs to finish her water, because it was good for her.

The same process repeated, again and again.. for a full 1.5 hours.

Did she drink water in the end? Only half of what I targeted her to finish. I decided that it was going nowhere, and since she already finished 2 ounce, I moved on to her nap time, and let her face the consequence... of thirst till the next feed.

Honestly, she wasn't that thirsty.. so there's not much consequence to face.

I think as a mother 1st time disciplining her, I did very well. No time did I lose patience or control. I was calm, collected and very insistent and firm. I assured her of my love, gave careful instructions on what I want her to do, and told her firmly of the consequence.

The entire process left deep deep thoughts in me though.

1. Johanna's personality/gift.
Every since we brought her home from hospital, in the very first week, my confinement lady (Aunt) commented that she's very strong physically. She was able to lift up her head at age week 2 and sat up at 4 months. Barely 6 months, Jo was crawling. Everyone who's every carried her says "Hey, what did you eat or feed your daughter? She's very strong".

I also remember bringing her to PD for vaccines. PD calls her the "No fuss baby" because Jo only whines once for every jab. Even those that are supposedly super painful she only whines once and then that's it. No more tears. PD likes her and says she's very steady babe.

As her mother, I agree my daughter is strong. But as the one praying and seeking the Lord daily, I sense God showing me not only is she strong physically, she's also strong in her personality. Yes, Jo is very no fuss and very steady. She's not afraid of trying new things and pain. Yet, when she doesn't want something, she's very strong and insistent as well.

I ended the day praying and asking the Lord to teach me how to handle and grow my daughter. I believe strength is a gift from God... but strong people.. well can go either ways. If turned for the Lord, it will be use as an attribute to stand up for God in His kingdom.

2. The Father's heart.
Well.. who else does Jo take after? The mother lah!

Yes, I am strong. I recalled my ex leader ever said, when I was 18 that I was a wild horse. Yes, this wild horse took many hard knocks that messed up her life that she learn to yield and surrender to the Lord.

When I disciplined Jo today, I really felt what Abba Father must have felt in the years when He was disciplining me. How it must have broken His heart when I was so insistent what I wanted. How He kept assuring me of His love and what was best for me.. and how I didn't want to listen...

What really struck me was... you know how I always thought I paid the price when I didn't obey the Lord? Today, I truly realised God paid the price with me.

Just like how my arms are aching now after holding and feeding Jo non-stop for 1.5 hours through all the tussle.. the heartaches... it's not just Jo that paid the consequence.. I did too.

I ended the day too, thanking Jo for being part of my life.. and teaching me so many things. God, your ways are higher than my ways. I surrender. Teach me and help me Lord, to grow my daughter... and in the process grow myself.. that we'll all be like you. :)