Amazing...Grandma!

It's amazing what living with an elderly does to you.

Grandma has gone through World War, buried her husband due to racial riots, single-handedly raised 6 children and then 2 grandchildren.

It makes you realize what's important in life and what's not.

Nope, when you are old, you are not a burden to society. You are an asset. Grandma is like a pillar and anchor in my life. She teaches me what battles to fight and what to let go. Whenever I am discouraged and down, she's the one who speaks words of truth to me, often, the perspective of the Lord on that situation.

And tomorrow, Grandma is getting baptised at the age of 87! Praise God!

Earlier the night, she just called all her sons and non-believing children to inform them of her decision. Nope, she didn't bother to rationalize nor seek their blessings. She just informed them. Haha! I like her attitude!

And that's the simplicity of life. The right thing to do, when you are obeying God... just inform others will do. You don't need to be wavered by what they say or think.

Lord, thank you for putting Grandma in my life. She is a gift to me. Thank you!

It's been a year of Parenting w my Best Pal!

I've always known my husband's existence being in church so many years, but never really knew him personally. When I was finally intro to him after an outreach event on Dec 2003, I never expected to date him then and later, marry him in Nov 2006. Shortly after 2 becoming 1, we became parents of Jo in Sep 2008 and started this parenting journey.

The entire journey has been filled with ups and downs. At times, it was so bleak I honestly wondered if light was at the end of the tunnel. But thanks to the Lord, as we prayed and continue to be transparent and learn to accept each other, we emerge more together, more 1.. and more love.

I'm thankful to this great partner, who always steers me on the right course and to do what pleases the Lord. He's indeed my leader, my mentor, my teacher, my best friend and my best partner! :)

Thanks dear, for being such a great husband and father! You've been fantastic!

Johanna called me "Mama"

I cannot describe it.. it just happened. When feeding half way 2 weeks ago, she started calling me Mama.

And now whenever she wants me to pick her up, she'll call "mamamamamama" non-stop and do her "say please" sign.

And yesterday, Jo suddenly knows where is her head. When I sang the song "Head and shoulders, knees and toes" she suddenly pointed to her head. When I asked her to show me where her head was, she again pointed correctly.

And there was 3 weeks ago, when she suddenly held my hands and started walking. She nows understand "hold hands" and "walk walk walk in the light". I sing songs to her for both activity.

And there's the Carebear. I bought her a stuffed toy bear and began teaching her "Bao bao" = hug hug, "Pat pat" = sayang, "Kiss kiss" bear bear. All she can do now to the bear, and to people whom she's comfortable with.

There is tremendous satisfaction in her achieving all the above. All of them took time to be taught. I get so much satisfaction and affirmation whenever Jo picks up one new positive behaviour.

I get an amazing look on hubby's face too, when he goes - "huh, you taught her that?
" Hee.. one of the cheeky things I taught her was belly button. My daughter now knows where it is. When you ask her to show you where Daddy's belly button is, she crawls over, lift up his shirt and place her little finger into the hole.. all to tickle daddy!

I think God is like that too. He must be so satisfied and proud whenever we pick up a new trait that is His character... or values that He upholds.

Though the start was slippery, I'm really thankful for this parenting journey. I enjoy the process of teaching Jo new things. Hehehe... and amazing my all supportive and great husband.

Not sure what to feel and think... but just have to look up

Pastor Eugene was sharing this verse in Jeremiah 17 on God testing the heart and searching the mind. How true.

It's good to just pause and know that God's testing and searching through our thoughts and reactions. At the end of the day, it is God we answer to. So no matter what happens and what is going to happen, we need to just hang in there, and hang on God in:

1. Purity (In thoughts and action. Never think of retaliating)
2. Presence (In His provision. God IS IN control!)
3. Power (Power to Love.. choose to Love at all times)

3Ps - People, Programme, Place
&
Purity, Presence, Power!

I rest in You Lord. Let me rest in You alone.

Thankful- Grandma's salvation

Many relatives thank me for allowing Grandma into my house. In reality, I am the one that is blessed.

From Grandma giving me reassurance whenever I need it, to her recent SALVATION,and her simple faith... I am thankful.

God, thank you that in the darkest time, when I had to make a decision of moving Grandma in, and I was still suffering from panick attacks after childbirth, thank you that you helped me yield to you.

Happy Mother's Day to Me!

Was pleasantly surprised when I return from work yesterday, to find this on my study table. It's my mother's day present from my husband, on behalf of Jo. It was blasting the song "Though I walk through valleys low, I'll fear no evil.. like the waters still my soul, my heart will trust in You.."

Together with the gift, was a card from both my husband and daughter - My husband wrote "Dear, this gift is for you to worship God in the room. Trust in God, He is with us.. and so we can worship God together as the Wus".

My daughter wrote (actually it's my husband who wrote for her) "Happy Mother's day, I love you! Thanks for feeding me, cleaning me, disciplining me, hugging me, kissing me, petting me, sayanging me... i couldn't have asked for a greater mama than you. I am proud of you. You are the best Mama in the world."

I was so touched I broke down and cried.

I think only God truly knew how much I struggled in this journey, and how much grace He gave for me to overcome and walk this far. I have never been as humbled and weak in all my journeys. Indeed, there's no way except to trust Him.

And really, thank God for my husband! Thank God I married the man God chose for me! I'm very blessed! :)

Parenting

Been teaching Jo how to "Pass Motion" on the great white throne, drink from a straw, as well as boundary training. Saw a little progress with the throne and the straw.. but not too much success with Boundaries.

It is... draining sometimes to have to repeat myself again and again. "No, darling, stay inside."; "No, Jo, obey Mama. Stay inside."; "No, darling, you cannot go outside, stay inside." Like a broken recorder sometimes!

But to me.. this is a necessary evil. The end in mind is not the boundary. I don't really bother as much on safety as well. Some parts of me do want Jo to be well-trained so that people can affirm how good a Mum I am. But whenever God shows me that I am hungering after external applause, I pause, repent and ask the Lord to set my heart right.

So what's the reason for hampering over boundaries? Well, I believe the role of parenting, or rather my job in Jo's life, is to train her for Service to the Lord.

And in order for the Lord to use her - she needs to learn to obey.

Hence, the end in mind is not the boundary.. nor the safety. The end in mind.. is she learn obedience. Obedient to authorities.

Many men/ women in the bible had great talent.. but they did not pass the obedience Character test, took things into their own hands.. and downfall came.

Joyce, hang-in there. If it takes as long, it'll take as long. She needs to learn this, Jo's heart needs to learn to yield to God. It'll come. She'll learn. And God's grace will be there.